The Confidence You’re Looking For Starts With You

Let me offer you something—if you’re open. Just a little insight from someone who’s been through the fire and kept walking.

Most of us, whether we admit it or not, wrestle with feelings of inadequacy. Some carry it like a quiet shadow. Others cover it up with loud opinions or laughter that never quite reaches the soul. But it’s there—lingering in the corners of our self-talk, in the way we size up others, or downplay ourselves.

I remember once when someone told me, “At least I admit my issues,” and it hit different. I was trying to be supportive, to offer a little grace, and what came back felt more like a jab than a confession.

And that told me something—not just about them, but about all of us. Because we all have our moments where insecurity speaks louder than reason. Where instead of facing our own reflection, we throw a little shade at someone else’s.

But here’s the truth: the person next to you isn’t your competition. They’re just another soul trying to make peace with their past and find their footing in the present.

I’ve seen it time and again. One person finds their worth through being needed—longing to be chosen, adored, validated. Another struggles when they’re around someone they perceive as “better” or “further along.”

They don’t mean harm, but subconsciously, they start chipping away instead of building up.

It’s like trying to fix the mirror by breaking it.

As for me—I used to be that guy. Always feeling like I wasn’t enough. Not smart enough. Not in shape enough. Not successful enough. But I got tired of that echo. So I started working. I started changing. And not in grand, flashy ways. I just chipped away at the version of me I didn’t want to be.

I started working out. I got educated. I showed up for my family. I earned my MBA. I bought property. I stopped destructive habits. I lived on purpose. And yes—I even became a certified scuba diver at 62. Why? Because I could. Because I realized that confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build.

And you build it in the everyday choices—when nobody’s watching.

Confidence doesn’t come from putting others down. It comes from rising up.

And the beautiful part? Every single one of us has that power.

If I want to feel stronger, I train. If I want to live longer, I move my body. If I want to think sharper, I feed my mind. If I want to glow from the inside out, I take care of what I put into my body. None of it happens overnight. But every bit of it works.

It’s taken me decades, and I’m still evolving. Still growing. Still learning. But the biggest shift wasn’t in my muscles or my degrees—it was in my mindset.

So no shade to anybody still figuring it out. But at some point, you have to stop coping and start changing.

We all have our reasons. Our baggage. Our bruises. But we also have the ability to say: this isn’t the end of my story.

You don’t have to live in the shadows of your self-doubt. You can step into the light of your own transformation.

It starts small. It starts today. And it starts with you.

Now, if I had a church fan, I’d pass it to you. And if I had a plate to pass, I’d ask for your time, not your money. Time to believe in yourself. Time to get honest. Time to stop fighting people and start fighting for the life you actually want.

You’ve got what it takes.

Peace and power to you.

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